char siew and curry chicken: September 2007

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Hello and welcome back. My last post was too short as I thought there was a counselling session, BUT the session was actually today at 12. Imagine the embarrassment of walking in and apologising that you are late when you are actually 1 week early?

Anyway the gay guy is still trying to chase me, although sometimes I get a lucky break when my other friends kena disturb instead. And it seems that not many people like him anyway.

And I just found out that dota is bad for your health and studies, and now half the dota team has formed an Anti Dota club that pledges not to play dota till the next sem. So that's at least some kind of peer support group for an extremely addictive computer game.

And I started hanging out with the cina chinese (not the kedah gang). But these cina's are damn cool as their math is damn good, which just so happen to be my weakest subject. And they always study in the reading room which is JUST 4 floors downstairs instead of the library, which is 4 floors and 100meters away. And I am allowed to put my feet on the chair and makan curi curi in the reading room. Just that it can get a bit dangerous as some mosquitoes are playing about there and dengue is still hanging around this place.

In fact at one point the dengue was so bad that 1 person got infected every week for 3 weeks straight. But it should be ok now as no one got infected this week.

And now here come the big story. The mooncake festival!!!

Well you know what always happens for traditional chinese where they would first chant for an hour, then they will place an altar facing the moon and put their pomelos and joss sticks there. So well, the procession went normally but as we were walking around with the tanglungs we kena kacau by pak guard a bit but we all just play dumb, as there were 200 of us chinese (the whole college) and around 7 guards.

So we all adjourned to the ex-warden's house, (he hasn't moved out yet) and ate mooncakes, pomeloes and those ling jiao, and also yam. And then he started telling more stories of how the buddhist club was having an activity where they had this bamboo dance, you know like the kadazan people do?

And then those malays upstairs saw it and couldn't sleep because they thought it was an exorcism!!!! So the teacher told us that whenever the malays ask what we were doing next time, we just have to say that we panggil hantu and then brag about how many setans we managed to play with. Then the malays would run for their lives and sleep in the mosque for the next few months.

Man this is fun. Even the last time I went for CF and was carrying my Bible and my malay friends asked what is that? I answered kitab kafir. Man I wasted my chance. I should have said it was some haunted book from Romania, and it will turn you into a vampire if you put 20 black stones and 2 goat heads around it.

Anyway its already 12 and I have to go soon. Luckily the counselling room is just next door. So till next time, Chiao

-Pau-

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Well it's back again to the drawing/typing/queing up for long ridiculous hours room.

This week ain't as ridiculous as the previous one, except for the fact that I signed up for some mentor mentee thingy where I get to teach these people/animals biology. And the coolest thing is that I'll have access to some of the marking schemes the teacher has, and that's probably the only reason I signed up anyway.

Anyway I just missed a counselling session or something like that because I forgot about it, and I just realised just now. Anyway too late for that. I'll just kena from again later. Well I don't think they'll do anything anyway because i don't think it's terribly important.

The gay guy is still following me, although I managed to avoid him on Monday and Tuesday, he came back to haunt me on Wednesday and Thursday. The guy even went to exchanging places during class to sit next to me and haunt me, and make me not sleep in class. It didn't help my Math anyway since the Math here is almost double Math because it doesn't overlap with form 5. Thank goodness it wasn't STPM math or I'll kill myself.

The Muet is coming and my English still sucks with no teacher around and the teacher keeps canceling class because she is 'fasting' so the class ends very 'fast'. If only they could teach 'faster' because even thought the exam is next month I still don't know how the papers look like, apart from checking it out myself.

And I just found out that I'm burning a hole in my pocket by buying food from the Ramadan baazar, but I still think I'll continue eating there since it's not as bad as canteen food. And surprisingly no one got beaten up for eating in public so far, but keep listening for news just in case.

Well, don't have that much else to say apart from the fact that I'm sleep deprived, and guess what? The smokers actually smoke in the corridors instead of the toilets. That's so cool because the toilets actually smell like SHIT for once! And they actually puasa rokok during the fasting month.

But whatever. I think I can still go for that counselling thing since I'm only 1 and a half hours late. So this will be an exceptionally short post.

So ciao

-Pau-

Friday, September 14, 2007

Super Kao Long Issue of 14th September

So welcome back to another issue of my blog on the new address. Well it’s been a very eventful week as so many things have happened so I think I want to break it up into several pieces.

1,2 and 3. Here we go.

So let me begin with the first part of my story for the week. The gay guy. Recently, only a few days ago there was this guy damn gay in my lecture. It’s like this: All this while you don’t know this guy so well, then suddenly this guy starts to go damn close to you. It’s like every lecture till now he’s been sitting so close to me that I need to put my bag in between us. And despite that the guy will push his legs closer and closer until you feel very very sick and vomit. In fact once I tried to avoid him so badly I hurt my neck. My neck is Ok now but the problem hasn’t gone away unlike the pain.

And the worst thing is that everytime he greets me, he doesn’t say hi or anything but instead slaps my arse. And then he will say: malam ni kita study sama sama ya? Of course I don’t go study with him and give him excuses.

That guy is freaking disgusting and I want to vomit. And he has my phone number and wants to know where I go every night. Freaky isn’t it. And so far I’ve been trying my best to vary my schedule so that I won’t be followed. Right now I’m at the other boy’s dorm (there are 2 blocks). And it’s 8 at night. Normally I would blog on a thursday but it was a holiday yesterday since it was the first day of puasa month.

So I went to the halal haram counselor and he told me to jangan layan budak itu. Well, good advice I say, since if I whack him up with me members it will turn into a racial fight. So Wish me luck and hope he doesn’t pop into my room when I sleep. I only know that I will be safe for the next 2 nights because all my roommates, legal or otherwise, have gone home. So I am the only one having the room key.

As for me I will only go home during the raya break, which is one month from now.

The second part is the teacher’s birthday. This is supposed to be top secret as the Matrik people can’t know what’s going on with the Chinese community here. But since most of my viewers are from Hartamas, which is 2 people so far, it should be OK to let you know only some of the things. The teacher specifically told us to keep most things a secret, so I won’t tell much online after what happened to namewee. Maybe if you ask me in person I will tell some of the things.

Well this teacher is the only Chinese warden, or ex warden in the college. He just retired from wardening for ‘special reasons’ which he told me to keep secret.

He celebrated his birthday yesterday, and at 12 in the morning all the Chinese boys went to surprise him. After some trouble with the pak guard, we went and chilled at his house, which was just underneath our block. After some yam senging with pepsi and playing cho dai di, he went on to tell us some stories of how dirty the life of a Chinese living in a Malay world is. Not only living, but working in a Malay world.

I have to be careful with my words as he knows how to use friendster and has blasted some guys online for posting racist statements, but most of them are usually Malays who post rumours about someone converting out of Islam and how they should have a great big riot and beat the guy up. Something like what happened last few years where these big group of Malays came and attacked a church because they claimed that Moslems would be converted to Christianity, but in the end it was actually a group of Indians, but the Malays continued attacking anyway.

And on top of that he talked about topics like the pig farm closing down, and what the Malays would do if someone closed down all their lembu farms. And he asked why the orang asli don’t get special rights since they are the original people. And why not at every official function we have orang asli prayers instead of baca doa?

And what about the Malays? Aren’t thery just Indons? Anyway that is enough said already, and he explained it by using the Malay culture of dengki that existed before Hang Tuah. Like Hang Jebat who would kill for his own friend, so what more for Malays to claim special rights from the other Malaysians.

And he also said that the education system itself is at fault. I would agree as he is one of those directly involved in executing it. Do you know why they have agama and moral class? You see, in agama class the Moslems are told that their religion is supreme and other religions are shit. In moral class we are told to have the muhibah sprit and respect all religions.

You know what mara colleges are for? They teach the Malays to speak up and claim their rights, and other colleges teach students to follow the rules set by others. Basically everything is hardwired into the brains of little children for the ‘good’ of the country. Otherwise why don’t they let other races into mara colleges? Notice many politicians, especially the vocal ones who want Malay supremacy, come from a similar background? For example Hisshamudin and his keris were from Malay College Kuala Kangsar, no doubt an all Malay school.

And the teacher went on and told us about how life is for the Chinese in matrik. He even told us about some of the schemes that some Malay teachers TRIED to create to help their people. Well this is supposed to be normal for Malaysian standards, especially in a Malay institution. He was even accused as a Christian missionary when he suggested an English song to a fucked up closed minded Malay who thought that the song was going to convert him to Christianity. And the icing on top of the cake is that he is not even Christian!

And the coolest thing about this teacher is that he would defend the Chinese culture to the very teeth, and was saying that he would be the dead people on the Tugu Negara. Well, it’s quite true as he organized a Buddhist club and even organized Chinese New Year and Mooncake festivals.

And even though the pengarah does not allow people to carry tanglongs around the college saying that they would ‘burn down’ the college, he would go ahead anyway since it’s not that the Malays don’t smoke everywhere. And if Malays can have their religious activities like pertandingan azan which we tolerated till the wee hours of the morning, why can’t the Chinese have a simple walk around the college with a few lanterns?

And he talked and talked until the wee hours of the morning, 3 am to be precise, and then we thanked him and went back to our rooms. It’s pretty strange to see such a cheerful teacher by day turn into a politician by night.

And his advice is to use the MCA, but don’t vote for them. A puppet can work both ways as it can’t tell the owner from a stranger.

Next is the beginning of the fasting month. It's tough being Chinese as there is hardly any food to eat during this holy month. And you have to tolerate looking at more songkoks and kopiahs. But at least there should be less smoke in the toilets as they have to puasa rokok. But the cool thing is that there is a bazaar that we can patronise every evening, just that it's so freaking crowded that on the first day we only got the last bits of food. And we don't even give face to the Malays who buka puasa and eat in front of them just when they are super super hungry.

And guess what? Some of my friends discovered a new cyber café in town, and we went there and play Dota. But as usual I lost like crazy. For once we didn’t have a boring day.

Actually I have another special edition coming up soon but I can’t post it up yet because there is a lack of time. I already spent too much time on this issue.

I won’t be back till the raya holidays so wish me luck here.

Till next time, ciao

-Pau-

8th September 2007

Well this time I'll make it short because of the special edition.

So its been an eventful, but not good 2 days since my last post. The english club had been set up, and the president got an E for his english and cant speak a sentence without the STRESSSSSS. BTW I'm almost getting used to all this cronyism and bullshit prefrenced selection. I think that there are a handful of other people who can do the job better, and speak better, but since I'm soo used to acting ali baba I couldn't care less.

I tell you if my father was here, he would be proud. He is not dead but in USA and later going to Switzerland, so I won't see him anytime soon. Man it's so fun being a doctor.

Anyway I think it's become some sort of adulthood ritual for young chinese people to be discriminated so that they will become more mature.

Take this as an example.

Ali is an Indon. He works here as a constuction worker for 20 years, and applies for citizenship. Therefore he becomes a Malay, and his children will get so many scholarships he can't even pick the best one.

Ah Chong is a Chinese. He came from Guangzhou to work in a tin mine. He works for 20+years, and gets citizenship. And then he has kids. And grandkids. But in the end he still had to work super hard to send them to study overseas, because no one in Malaysia will give him a scholarship.

Well it's the irony, and there are almost as many Indons as Indians, so to all the Indians, LEAVE THE FUCKING COUNTRY BEFORE THE INDONS DISPLACE YOU GUNJEE!!
Otherwise you will be even more of a minority, and unlike in Australia or something, Malaysia DOES not protect the minority. In fact it's the other way round.

But I'm almost used to it already. And this time I can at least pass the work along to another Chinese and share the burden with my countrymen. In fact 50% of the commitee is Chinese, but they have differing views and such so it will still be a pain to work together.

BTW I got elected as treasurer for the english club.

So then we begin another round of alibabaness, and government mediocrity, and waiting 1 month for a budget for the club activities to land in my pockets, which will soon flow out. In a good way I mean. You all know that I'm not a swindler, as if the ACA doesn't exist.

Anyway it's getting quiet as its a class day(Yes on saturday) and it's not good to stay in front of the common comp for too long(even though there's nobody waiting) and it's very very quiet.

So,

ciaooooo....

-PAu-

Special edition:Must read if you like funny racist jokes

Hello and welcome back to another edition of my bog. This one will be a bit special, as I feel very closed minded today.

You see, I'm going to talk closed minded things again. This time it is about a speech that was given during a perhimpunan. I actually can't believe that we still have those riduculous ceremonies where we sing negarakuku and Allah selamatkan sultan and lagu kolej.

And you see everytime after the songs we would have a cereamah. Not a speech, but a ceramah like what the PAS people do in Kelantan.

And if you remember the last ceramah it was saying that doctors in UPM get gaji satu juta and orang matrik 4 flat dapat Havard, this time it was about 'kenapa result exam teruk'

This one is even more special than the previous ones as the bullshit went on for about half an hour. There we had the counsellor out on the stage and he said:

Tahu kenapa dapat results teruk? Sebab ilmu tak halal.

WTF was that supposed to mean? If rohani tak seimbang I can still accept, but ilmu tak halal is riduculous. And he went on talking about macam mana nak halalkan ilmu for about 10 minutes and then I fell asleep.

The irony of the whole 30 minutes was that he did not mention at ALL that we failed because we didn't study hard enough. Somuch for being a counsellor.

Anyway when I woke up saya menerima wahyu. Now I know the law of halal and haram.

It is very simple actually. Its basic math.

OK, the first law is :

Halal+halal=halal.

For example, chicken+rice=chicken rice ...eq(1)
halal+halal= halal ...eq(2)
Sub (1) into (2)
therefore chicken rice is halal.

Another example, curry+fish=curry fish ...eq(1)
halal+halal=halal ...eq(2)
Therefore curry fish is halal.

OK lets do something harder. This is the second law

pork+rice=pork rice ...eq(1)
haram+halal=haram ...eq(2)

Therefore pork rice is haram.

OK another one

bacardi+coke=bacardi coke ...eq(1)
haram+halal=haram ...eq(2)

Therefore bacardi coke is haram

But what about the third law?

What is haram+haram?

The answer is halal because negative x negative = positive

The experimental value has yet to be determined. That means that if I eat pork in class, the ilmu is halal. Because I didn't halalkan the ilmu, so I must eat pork to make it halal.

But the only question remains is that how long will the effect last? Which is the optimum effect?

If I eat pork;
after class?
before class?
during class?
1 day before class?
2 days before class?
1 week before class?
1 month before class?
1 year before class?
since the day I was born?

*Assumption:Pork was used as the haram ingredient because it is cheaper than XO cognac. In theory alcohol and pork should have the same effect on the halal rule, but alcohol makes you drunk during class, and you cannot even understand what the teacher just said, so it's useless even if it's halal

Well, science cannot answer everything, so we'll have to do more research later and dapat more wahyu. Anyway, that's all for my special edition I hope to come up with more next time.

For all the Melayu's out there reading this, this is just a joke. Nothing personal against anyone. (No, really)

6 th September 2007

Ok let me start with a real joke in collaboration with Reader's digest humour special. Yes I've read it already.

Once upon a time there was this Indian called Nut. He was sharing a room with 3 Malay guys. Every morning the Malays would wake up to pray toward their holy city at exactly 5 something in the morning.

So one day, Nut decided to wake up early to watch them pray. And then suddenly at 5 am he felt something wrong. The Malays were praying to him!

Now tell me how did this happen?

His bed was facing the holy city!

Tada! That was the lamest joke ever told in the history of aerobic bacteria.

But its true, and this is one of the little storiues that I wrote in a note to post it on my blog later, but somehow I forgot where I left it. Never mind you can read the next few jokes on the following posts.

Ok back to my life. Life seems Ok at most, and my english draft got rejected like there was no tommorrow, and I just managed to re-do the whole thing more or less.

Anyway my classes are Ok, as usual I'm stuck most of the time studying or doing math(I got a B remember) and my nerdism is at 9.5/10 because I don't think I'll go back till Raya, so my parents tell me to go full steam ahead and study like you never study before.

And then only you get a 4.00, and MAYBE you can get to MU, if not then IMU twinning to US, or maybe some UNIMAS or some other lesser known medical school.

And once you get into medical school, then you have to study (again) like a freaking donkey, untill you graduate, and then go for housemanship, and work 36 hours a day for a year and a half. And then you work more untill you specialise, and then, by the ripe old age of 40, you can actually work 8 - 6, not 9 to 5.

And hopefully, you get to retire at 65, and you still get called up for super emergencies. For example the surgeon who just did another Mahathir.

And then you die and ask: Was doing medicine worth all the trouble?

And when you die the only people who will remember you are the people who you saved.

Now that sounds much better. Provided that you patients aren't dead yet, because most of them would die before you.

Anyway that still sounds ok. I'm not at the 'regretting what I done' stage yet and envying my lawyer and accountant friends YET, so I still have some motivation to go ahead. Just that everytime I hear someone go to UK or Aus to do medicine my spirit drops, because I'm here and probably doomed in this coutry for a LONG long time.

Anyway I have a question to ask. Will you migrate permanently after you graduate, or not? (please state job)

Ok I think you got the point. Post your opinion on my comments page.

Now back to my life again, I finally got a name for the immigrant guy who always comes to my room. Since he looks like a rempit and smells like kretek I'll call him kretek man. And to update you on the footwashing in sink, it's been going on as usual, with the boys queing to wash their feet in the sink before prayers, so I avoid the toilets at that time. And the food here is just as shitty as it has always been, but there's nothing I can do about that, so I think I'll join the Moslems to fast. No serious. I think, I think, the canteen will close during the fasting month, so I'll need a lot of cookies and granola bars to stay alive.

And then there's the story about Dao going back so good luck Dao and hope you eat lots of pork while you still can, or you'll die of a heart attack in the hospital, and I'll claim your grand piano in your will. And then everytime I play it the curse of the Dao will haunt the room with the most soothing music ever known, and then I'll be the next Beethoven.

Anyway also good luck to those who are taking their A levels (Cambridge) and make sure you get into Cambridge or LSE or whatever.

So with this, I need to go and print the English Project at another miserable price, and burn another few ringgit just sitting here in front of the screen.

So ciao!

-Pau-

ps I forgot something. Insult the Melayu!

Missing post that was supposed to be for the 10th August

I am so freaking sorry I forgot to post this. I know Naveen was eagerly awaiting this post as I told him that I already typed it but haven's posted it up yet. This is a post almost half a month late, as if you may have noticed that there has been a large gap in my posts. Well just an intro to what this post is about, I typed it while I was still in Johor. Ignore any instructions or requests. Words in blue are typed on the 30th august, words in black are on the 10th august.

Hey look it's already thrusday! One more day till the holidays and I'll get a brief escape from jail. Ahh... the sweet escape....

And guess what, I finished my moral project! Wohoo now it's only English to go, and I don't think I can finish that one so soon anyway, so I'll leave it for the holidays. At least to keep my feeble brain going for a while. I've already done my lab reports in advance and also some of my math so I don't have to worry about that later on when I come back.

And guess what, I heard from the guys last night for the dinner, some guy actually turned up in a full tux. He was the pengerusi of course. d(0-o)b

Btw my dinner is tonight and I decide to go plain so that I won't get noticed. I already have too much attention here, usually for the wrong reasons.

And I am right now enjoying the 3 hour break before I go back to class at

2-4 pm

. So I'm wondering, should I go for lunch now, or 5 muinutes from now as I'm really hungry. Woke up late so didn't have a good breakfast. Anyways, I going to go home soon cause I heard that my long lost cousins from US are back. Oh wait did I tell you that yesterday?

Oh dear my memory.....

Anyhow, if anyone of you have any idea for my english project titled:

Describe how you can promote a closer relationship among neighbours(give why as well)

Describe how you can promote a closer relationship among neighbours(give why as well)Describe how you can promote a closer relationship among neighbours(give why as well)Describe how you can promote a closer relationship among neighbours(give why as well)Describe how you can promote a closer relationship among neighbours(give why as well)Describe how you can promote a closer relationship among neighbours(give why as well)Describe how you can promote a closer relationship among neighbours(give why as well)Describe how you can promote a closer relationship among neighbours(give why as well)Describe how you can promote a closer relationship among neighbours(give why as well)Describe how you can promote a closer relationship among neighbours(give why as well)

(I did that just to make sure you read what I was saying) lol

So post your answers and suggestions anywhere on my freindster, or just email it to me.

Just make sure you put your subject on the email.

And can anyone tell me what's the shortest time necessary to get undang-undang or driving law? I could go and take it if 2 weeks is enough.

Well I didnt write an ending for this post but I shall give a proper one now, and for the previous post as well.

Ciao

Love,

Pau

PS: No melayus were hurt in the production of this text. I haven't done that for ages ever since namewee and his negaraku came online, so I have to be extra careful.

30th August 2007 MERdeka

Welcome back to my blog, this time its the 30th of August and that means one more day and its merdeka day.

Well that may sound like good news, but guess what? The little Jalur Gemilang flag that I hung outside my room 'disappeared'. So much for merdeka semangat. Even my ketua klass also had a flag stolen from his room. So now the total count of stuff stolen is:

1. Shorts

2. Flag

And another funn story is that just yesterday some guys were running down the corridor (sigh.. Again) And this time they went throwing m slippers (and my roomates and neighbours') at each other. And guess what? My slipper was unlucky enough to be thrown down to the roof of the forst floor.

Luckily my hand was long enough to grab it from the stair railings without climbing out and walking on the roof.

And they're having a merdeka celebration complete with countdown and that makes today a bad day for studying, and with my results I also very scared to go home leh...

Mah Chao I got a B for math... How can this happen for God's sake. And there's no double math or anything here. Simple math and I got BBBBB, stupid stupid stupid. I got a B for the exam in the lousiest education system in the country. Man I lost all my ego and pride.

Well enough of the stupid mourning and self pity. I just found out from Nat that Eujhin got a perfect score for Bio paper 1, so congrats you are now the King in Ms Foong's class.

And btw both me and Nat (My HELP buddy who came along with me to matrik) got a perfect score for C1 C2 but got B for matrik math. Man this sucks. Maybe its the new system that we're not used to or the different format or something like that.

Anyway I already said enough of the sef pity. Lets talk about something else.

Hey guess what I now have a water heater in my room. Wohooo.

It was originally from carrefour but it rosak, so we had to change it the next day (before I left). Anyway my water woes are over, but new problems always turn up somehow.

I'm currently sitting in a room with 20 computers and 40 people. And now is only lunch time. You should have seen yesterday evening at 7 when people, like me, were queing up outside the shop and waiting for it to open, and queing up another 30 minutes to wait for a go at the printer.

The situation is getting worse as people are struggling with their projects last minute, and guess what? We still have to pay for it, 2.20 per hour. Ridiculous. Just this morning the newspapers said that there were billions of dollars ready to be invested in IDR and yet we have NOT enough computers...

Man what is wrong with the world

Just because we're too young to vote for Barisan so they don't need to take care of us. Never mind...

And yes I was saying...

I'm still struggling with my never ending homework and since my results weren't that fantastic, looks like I need to spend less in front of this stupid idiot box and more in the library, which is as empty as ever.

Well if any of you have any tips for studying please tell me somehow, like putting it on my comments page or emailing me. I do read my inbox you know, even if it's only once or twice a week.

Anyway I still hate my current life although I finally found Chinese guys that are as racist as me. No kidding man.

I think that all Chinese are racist now. Well... we do live in similar conditions that shape our behaviour and attitudes. And the cool thing is that the country is still stable despite the races hating and biting each other from behind. Well after seeing all that it only makes me want to leave the country more, despite what I used to say that I would stay here for a long time.

Well that's that. I need to move on to doing some more of my project now and joining the exodus of last minuters. Anything new will be up here as a new post.

The HOLIDAYS : a brief review

OKayyyyy... sorry I went of without telling anyone that my blog went on holiday the moment I went on holiday. And I 'forgot' to post up my last post so you guys will just have to fill in the blanks DIY.

So its already Saturday morning, and its realll early in the morning, like 00.17 am, and its freaking cold because my sisters are sleeping in the sitting room, just for fun. Not because they don't have any beds to sleep on (my youngest sister has 3 in fact) but they like wasting the air conditioning and causing a big hole to form in the ozone layer.

Anyway this is MY blog so I'll talk about myself and you do the listenting/reading.

SO my hols have been OK with most of my goals achieved, except that WK and co. couldn't come up with mission 2. But I had a good time playing 3 slippers, futsal, movies, mamak, Otai and just driving aroung a little circuit going up the hill, stopping, pull the handbrake, free gear, gear 1, lepas clutch, tekan minyak, lepas handbrake, and give a good , vroooooooommmmmmmm, and go down the hill.

And what a week. So little I had acomplished in that week. My lab report is still hanging without a conclusion, my english project is still in draft form, and what little knowledge I had slipped away like tangki bocor, compared to what I was like before I entered matrik.

Before matrik I was on almost top form, with a 200/200 math score, and I was in tip top shape for the a level exam... But now I'm just slightly short of being in junkie form with too much mcD, seafood, and meat. In fact I think I lost 3 kg in Matrik, gained another 3 after a buffet, and lost another 1 kg after shitting. So the net gain in weight in 2 weeks is 2 kg, which still puts me dangerously low on BMI.

Anyway food aside, I just got a short crew cut as a sign of repentance from my allmighty lazy 2 weeks and to make sure my brains dont keep oozing out.

And I brought home some of the junk that was hanging in johor uselessly all this while, like my pyjamas, novels, and other junk. These stuff would probably never see action in johor, so I opted for their warly dismissal. And I plan to bring less junk this time, so my room will be less cluttered. Already I'm the only kid known to bring a bookshelf from KL to johor, and that shelf also filling up fast, with nuts and useless books taking up most of the space. In fact I call myself a virus, a bit like what Agent Smith describes humans as to Morpheus in the first Matrix.

And wow I can't belive life is going so fast for me its ONLY been 8 months since I left school, and 3 months since I went to matrik, but it feels like a long time. Especially when you walk around infron of the school and say: Hey I used to go there you know. And also the fact that you can still remember the kakbang in the canteen, and how to open the storeroom, and what stupid stuff happened in Chinatown, and the fact that Chinatown doesn't exist anymore. And the list goes on and on. In fact WK missed the school so much that he wanted to paint it again, just like what he used to do in the old days, but stupid we couldn't come up with a good design so we called it quits. And this time probably we'll get caught so it wasn't worth the risk.

Anyway I just had to stay content with playing slippers and terrorising the neighbourhood by screaming and shouting and throwing tennis balls in the dead of the night with me buddies.

And the fact that almost everyone except Loong and Ravin and probably half of the A49B HELP class is staying in Malaysia, with everyone else going off to a land far far away, and never coming back except for disasters, and sitting and kutuk the coutry from afar. Man I always wished I could do that, and I'm considering Sweden as a country of choice. Stable economy, liberal people, environmental freindly policies, no riduculous sultans, peaceful country, good weather, rapid growth, good government, low corruption, safe, lots of Ikea furniture, and no Indons. Just that the Swedes don't speak much english and you dont get roti canai or ramli burgers.

Anyway I just realised that even after medical school (even if I get into UM) I will be bonded 5 years (I think) if I do my masters (specialise) in Malaysia, and the trick is you have to take the scholarship, and the bond, and get stuck in this rathole for another 5 years, and by the time I want to subspecialise they'll probably bond you again, so I'm thinking that hey! You might never get out to Sweden or USA or something and just end up living like my parents, who had kids and settled down in KL. And their son having to cope with so called racism, no free press, lots of propoganda, and Rempits.

And what happened to the idea that all Chinese parents save up so that their kids can study overseas and don't come back ever again?

God this world is so strange, with me leading the strangeness.

And when the world is against you who do you turn to?

Superman of course. But since he's just a fictional character they just make him into a comic book and they sell like hotcakes, because everyone wished that they had someone to turn to when something goes wrong. What's funny is that that's probably how religion came about, (apart from the sheer political power of religion) because people need someone to turn to (or blame) when something goes wrong and they don't care whether the God exists or not.

Of course I'm just taking a different view towards all religions as a whole. I still go to church you know, but most of the times I go as a sinner and hypocrite.

Enough of religion, it shouldn't even be in this blog in the first place.

Anyway I'm getting a wee bit sleepy, and there's some packing to be done tommorrow, so I shall sign off for now. The next time I shall be hopefully back in Johore and cursing the foul air that reeks the place. Egad! Did anyone notice how pleasant I was today, without a single hint of Melayu bashing on this issue of my blog. That's probably because the first few melayus have contacted me online, with lAtEp (latep) leading the battalion on my friendster.

No offense, but since it's my blog I will continue to do as I see fit. No one can change me ... Yet...

So that is all my friends. I shall continue my journey through time and space and blogs like I always have, and not stop time like Hiro Nakamura.

So ciao!

Signing off,

Pau

ps: Peiru get some sleep. You're going to turn into a zombie if you don't

Spookedy room. Aih... Things I would do for internet....

Ola and welcome vack to annother edition of Pau's bloggy. By the way this was made possible thanks to a 5 ringgit 10 foot LAN cable, a pair of quiet shoes, and a sneaky brain that is willing to walk 300 meters to steal an internet connection in the tutorial complex. I typed this in my room and posted it in the complex.

Well this time I'm blogging from the relative safety of my room, and the immigrants are not in as they still have class. So what has happended for the past week you ask?

Well, it's been an OK week, with the holidays in full view on the horizon. I've decided not to go to Kedah to be a SPECTATOR for the public speaking cause I don't think I'll be of much help, as the Melayu guy still says

'Mercedes is a very powerful and exclusive car made in German.' and

'We should example the Western countries to make Malaysia modern.'

Yes he actually says that.

So I'm banking on the Indian girl and hopes that the teacher is merciful enough to give the poor Chinese dude something.

And the college tennis team has improved a lot, and their training programme is fantastic. I just got beaten by their girls team, so that speaks a lot. And my hands are still shaking from the bloody shock from the tennis raquet.

And let me tell you something interesting. Just yesterday, the other dorm which is called Asrama al'Jazari ( pronounce it as al'Jazeera ) just got spotcehcked for ciggys and fags. BTW I'm staying in Asrama al'Kindi ( pronounce it as al'Qaeda ).

Apparently the wardens got many informners and went straight to the rooms and got the corrrect people who were selling fags to the others. And I heard the teachers actually belasah the guy and beat him up real good. And they threw bricks at his locker (which he refused to open) and broke the whole damn locker and took out the ciggys. And they shouted and yelled and hit many other guys and rounded them all up. And they even expelled the fag distributor. After smashing his face and locker of course. In my opinion the wardens did the right thing and the faggots deserved to get hit. It's no big deal if you smoke in your own private estate but smoking in a communal room is pissing off. And at least the teachers showed that some form of law and order still exists in this screwed place.

Actually, my block is also facing a serious smoke problem as the smokers don't even care anymore. I've seen people smoke in the toilets without even hiding behind the doors. They just casually walk around and look at you, hoping to remember your face so that they can take revenge if you call the wardens. And worse still, some just smoke in their rooms. Just walk down the corridors and smell the wonderful nicotine oozing into your cranium. Although I still don't know where the smoking immigrant smokes. It's very obvious that he smokes every evening and the only missing piece is where he smokes and who he gets fags from.

Anyway I can't wait for to finish my projects so that I can go home and enjoy life to the fullest.

Oh God the immigrant is back and he's praying. No need to guess what he's praying for. Probably prays not to get caught next time he fags. Luckily the kiblat is behind me. Oh shit here he comes.

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Luckily I saved the file. Phew.. That was close. No really! It's true.

Now he just left for my neighbour's room. At least he didn't catch me mengumpat behind his back. Hey it's a big crime in Islam and all the Malays( and others ) are quick enough to say 'Oi jangan mengumpat!' when someone says something gossipy. Well at least I'm more or less oblivious to that Islamice rule.

And guess what?

I found out that this place isn't that bad after all. In fact it's good. I noticed that if you lower your standard enough you can actually enjoy this place. Hey what's wrong with squatting on the sinktop and washing your feet in the sink? If everyone does that it means it's normal right?

And what about walking around in nothing but your boxers? I've even seen one guy do that with suspenders. It's summer right? Time to head for the beach! Hey wait there's no beach here, so the toilet should do fine. And what's wrong with eating with your hands, and then playing with the canteen cats, and then continuing your lunch. I bet it's more tasty as there is now additional parasites, worms and fungi. Ya people in Thailand and Cambodia actually pay to eat grubs so what's wrong if you can get it free in Malaysia?

But the most stupid thing is how people here don't sleep. Even the Indians and Chinese. They wake up at 3 or 4 to study. Maybe that's why there so 'smart' . Hey really. I found ONE person who has 11 A1's and ONE person who turned down a JPA to Russian medicine. Thats already 2 people (both Chinese) that are really smart. Man that's out of 2400 ( minus the guy who got expelled just now) and hey, 2 people in my class got A for Chemistry.

I seriously hope that I was one of them, otherwise the 10000++ ringgit that went to HELP would be a shameful waste. And my ego would be so damaged that I also would wake up at 4 and start screaming.

Anyway what's over is over and can you believe that even after 5 grand years of Science and Math in English, some people still answer in BM. Well since I'm an optimist today, hey what's wrong with 5 years? That's a very short time as we still have 13 more years to Vision 2020.

By the way, my controversial 'illegal' clothesline is attracting a lot of attention. You see after the stupid ass rempit stole my beloved shorts I've started tying a nylon string between 2 pillars near my room and hanging my clothes there. Results are amazing as the longest drying period of the clothes was 2 days, with both days being extremely wet with rain. The record for the shortest was 24 hours, clocked just now.

I hope the warden leaves my project alone as tecnically, it's not illegal as it's not mentioned in any of the rulebooks and the wardens never mentioned anything about adding string in between 2 pillars.

______________________________________________________________________________

Ok I'm now in the tutorial room. At forst it was crowded bu now it's getting creepy as all the lights are going off. And it's very big. Almost 40++ classes and 20 ++ labs. Who know what may be in the corners. All I can hear is my own key board.

So........

Ciao

Love,

-Pau-

who hooooooo don't need to pay money!!!

Ladies and gentlemen boys and girls, I would like to present to you the first no frills BLOOG OF PAU!!!

Yay I finally convinced my mom to lend me her laptop, and since m y exam is over( for now) I can tell you more Tuk Janggut Stories. Now you see, I will divide this into seperate posts so that you don't get a headache reading this.

Monday:

Wahhhhhh its the first day of exams I have 3 subjects, math chem and english 1 hour each. Stupid the exam so kau one cannot get full marks (ceh___) but then cannot screw up because the midterm exam takes up 10 % of the final score, so any bonus here would be a big bonus later on. But as usual people like me are prone to making careless mistakes here and there. But the cool thing is that the math here is damn hard, in fact its much harder than the a level math, or maybe brits aren't good at math. But the other subjects are at more of less the same level. The bio especially. The teacher is so shitty and the books are so shitty that most students would buy those mat saleh books to read. The best buy around here is Biology by Campbell and Reece. For those out there, its pretty cheap but not as perfect as the one by Raven and Johnson. But dude, its cheap so no one complains.

And the thing abou matrik is that the teachers here kutuk a levels, they say it's easy and the teachers at HELP kutuk matrik say that it's too easy. TO be honest, I think that neither are true. I think form 6 is hard and everything else is ok. To think that I am learning only 70% of the form 6 syllabus in matrik also I want die liao, how bout those suffering in form6? So a tribute to Loong and May Yee and Ravin for willing to go kill themselves. lol.

I think the main advantage of matrik is that you study 24-7, with no entertainment, only 4 weeks of holidays through the entire course and everybody is crazy, and you learn how to be independent. I guess. The good thing about a levels is that you get the best teachers from all over the country, not like the ones here. You know my bio teacher just told the whole class that doctors boleh dapat gaji 1 juta kalau kerja dekat UPM. I was like WTF you trying to kill me is it? Already people say that mak bapak doktor, now kerja dapat 3 juta la.... Lucky there are enough security guards otherwise I sure get kidnapped one.

And speaking of kidnappings, I am already the victim of pants napping. Ya lah, some stupid fella go steal my shorts and now I have no shorts until my mom comes to send me a new pair. Diu the asses. I curse my pants with dog saliva and pork for them next time.

Nevermind lets go to Tuesday

Whoa its tuesday its chemistry exam. Oh its only 2 days and its already been such an eventful week. Oh ya I frogot to tell you that I ran for the Jogathon kind of thing. I don't remember the exact name because you know malaysians we always make something stupid sound so grand, ie: yang amat berbahagia, tan sri...... Duli yang maha mulia yang dipertuan agung tunku..... and it's not that they're that powerful anyway. (screw najib I don't care if he cracks down on bloggers who kutuk the agung and islam and the government)

So I ran( actually I walked) and I lost of course. So lets forget about that and move on.

I had a listening test in the evening. For english la, what were you thinking? And then everyone started saying that the tape they played was using my voice. WTF I know my voice very nice la, but don't go accuse me of sabotaging the tape. Speaking of nice voice, I forgot to tell you how I got humiliated by my (former) math lecturer who made me sing in front of the lectuere hall cause he said my voice very nice. WTH these people are crazy cos whoever thinks my voice is nice must be deaf or never watched Alif sing(lol long time no hear his songs).

And this was the day I made my first assault on the malay dominancy of football

Hip Hip Hurray!

I managed to get 7 people,(with some help of course) and we hoarded the futsal field, and I borrowed a college ball to play. Wow we were having so much fun and the malays actually asked us whether they could join. And this continued until there were about 25 people on the field, and the palce turned into a warzone. One by one the Chinese couldn't keep up, and left the game. In the end only me and Tan were left.

These guys are crazy you know. You can't hold the ball for more than 2 seconds or 10 guys would come chasing after you. And these guys play with their feet and not their brains or teamwork. It's all about speed and rembat power. No strategy needed. And my new pair of specs just got smashed, lucky didn't break, and I smashed it on saturday as well, and it took a couple of scratches. And someone rembat the ball up 4 stories and the borrowed ball got stuck on the roof of the lecture hall. Lucky no need to pay cause the teacher just made a report.

Anyway moving on my clothes from friday hasn't dried yet and I'm cursing and checking my clothes frantically so that no one steals them again.

Wednesday.

Whoa back to normal again, and whatever work that we hutang from the past 2 days must be paid back in full, plus interest. This is stupid because I just recieved a handful of projects to do, with one for each subject, almost. That inspired me to borrow the laptop, as it was a difficult decision, since peoples lives are depending on it (ceh). But don't worry no people were harmed in the making of this post as my mom had backed everything up in a portable hard drive.

And I just realised that this quite OK Iban girl left the college to go for mara. What the hell is with these people? She said at first she wanted to be a doctor, then she took mara for computer engineering. d(0_o)b . Who the hell would do that? Be like Karim. Follow your dreams. It's not even your money it's your parent's money and you can't wait for them to die to pass it on to you. OMG did I just say that?

And just to let you know, everyone was shocked at the Chinese revolution and said, Wah I never seen chinese play football before! Wah China beat Malaysia 5-1 sial !!

Anyway, it's Thursday now

OK OK I give up, I'm not going to wait for my stupid clothes to dry and I'm bringin them into the room. I hung the clothes from every possible spot and walla! SUDAH KERING!! stupid socks took almost a week to dry. Lucky didn't get stolen. By the way thursday was when I came down with a bad cold that had me coughing until sunday(today)

Since my throat was sore and my liver sick of strepsils, I won't type much to respect my cells.

Friday.

Oh another stupid day where the food sucks, cough in class and so on.

Saturday.

Same as friday. No really!

saturday was repacement class for hari raya holidays so it was the same. Just that I didn't do my laundry cause I already got it done on friday.

And I me, the afgan terrorist, finally got his new supplies for the war efforts, and also more imported nuts. And boy was I lucky my mom bought me some new shirts so I got something to wear for the dinner.

By the way the dinner is where the girls show off their tudungs and compare the microscopic details and the guys have to cover their eyes because there's not a single inch of sking shown. No offence to anyone, especially the girls reading this cause I may sound a little sexist there. But as usual I found out that girls and guys shaking hands or anything tak tutup aurat is big news here. So the dinner should be a sleep through thing, although some of the kukus here think that it's a prom. Well lets keep this a little secret and don't tell them anything and let them build a little wall of bricks around their heads.

And I played futsal again and got my head smashed. These guys don't care even if you're standing right in front of them. They just rembat only. And I stepped on my specs and got them scratched. And don't worry you still have 4 fingers up.

And finally got my new supply of internet. Although it's only temprorary. I only get to use it for 2 weeks before my mom wants it back. And I brought my bookshelf from home since the immigrants took up all the space that I used to put books.

Sunday.

What's a sunday without a sundae? It's a shitday. Well here I am a hijacked the LAN cable from the computer room and using FREE internet. Finally I don't have to pay for it.

Well, I think my clothes are going to dry since I hung them in my room straight. And the immigrants balik kampung so I don't have to worry about space for the next 5 hours.

Well, all thats well ends well I guess, and with this I officiate my second month of matriculation, and my sad second month an informal BM lesson.

With regards

-Pau-

Oh no I forgot the ciao!

Another stupid post. I lost track on how many there has been already.

Hello this is Mr Pau from Johor. Whoooo....

Welcome to REmpitland.

No no no I'm NOT normal cause of the usual pre exam stress catching up on mua. My mid term exam starts next monday and end on next tuesday. Interesting? Maybe not.

Currently I'm sick of eating granola bars for breakfast and I'm in a real tough spot as it's getting hard to find free drinking water. I only have about 3.5 litres left in my room, which should be enough for 2 days without exercise.

And I'm still stuck with the stupid Ali Baba job of writing the speech for the Malay guy and letting him memorise it and vommit it on that day. The topic is Did you know that Malaysia became indepenent 10 years ago? (hint hint the financial crisis.)

Whooo the weekend I went back(last week) went super fast wei... Went home, play piano, do my Ali Baba job till 2 in the morning, sleep, wake up, do the Ali Baba go Dao's house, admire the GRAND piano, go back, do Ali Baba, play piano, sleep and get food poisoning the next day. And worst of all I forgot to perform my little ritual of berdosa-ing, meaning that I'll have to eat pork, drink alcohol, and play with wet dog everytime I come back. Only 2/3 was performed as I didn't have booze at home.

BTW, I won't be coming back until August and I'll have to live my life sin free and eat shitty food everyday. That's because I have extra classes on Saturdays until the semester hols. Speaking of shitty food, the canteen yesterday had uncooked chicken on the menu, and they mixed it with the normal menu, and sold it to us. Metaphorically of course.

Whooo.... Only now I'm starting to condemn my own fate of being grounded in this stupid country for the next 8 years at least. And it was all thanks to the stupid propaganda that made me choose to go matrik. What the hell I don't believe that my dad has no money. He drives a Proton and buys a house in the midle of Segambut. Of ya he was saving for my education all right. Yes ladies and gentlemen, the cost of educating a crazy, deranged, racist kid in matric is very high. You need about 10 bucks a day for food, and about another 3 bucks for water and newspapers.

Aih..... what to do.

I look at all Dao's pictures in England ah...

Wah the grass so green....

No rempits to smoke in the toilets.....

Lots of food....

And most of all, long holiays.

I need a holiday...

Haven't had one since last december.

Well, the good news is that I'll have a week off for Hari Raya. I mean logically, how can the Malays live without eating more curry chicken, this time with lemang and ketupat some more.

And another peice of good news is that I found not one or two, but an entire gang of racist people. I even joined their friendster group, which is of course, reserved for KMJ students who are non-Muslim.

Now enough of the good news. Lets go back to the bad news. My room is currently facing an immigration crisis. As you see, after my two roomies left, there were two empty spaces in the room. My other remaining roomate started calling his friends over, and then they started staying long term in my room, even though it's illegal. First the brought their books, then their mugs, and then their pillow and blanket, and you know what happens next.

And the worst of all the first day they moved in they called their friends as well, as if it was some housewarming party. And again at precisely 1 am, I woke up to stuff the cheap MAS earplugs. But this time I did it right in front of their smuck faces, and then they never came back.

So is that good news or bad?

But then I'm still unsure about the 'status' of the other immigrant, who sometimes smells of smoke. WTF if that guy smokes in m room, that's it man. I won't even go call the warden. I think I'll start a fight becasue I can't control my anger all the time you know. I have a cina friend whereby all of his roomates smoke in the room, and even his towel and clothes smell of nicotine. I mean you want to smoke go outside la.... Why the hell must you smoke inside the room. Are these guys so lazy that they cannot walk outside?

Now more bad news is that just before the exam I hav to go for a jogathon, or Larian KAKOM, whatever fancy word that means. I think I'll just pengsan on the road and let the PBSM carry me to the library, since I am also very lazy to run.

Btw I think the stupidification of the brain cells have already begun. My neurones are starting to rot and decompose. Even my friends ask me whether I'm ok or not. But I think the answer is not, as civilisation is hard to come by in these parts, only present in small packets scattered throughout the many acres of land.

Aiya so tired I cannot think of anything to add. And my 1 hour of Internet is fizzling out like a burnt matchstick.

Well, there goes another RM2.20. At least today I didn't have to que for it. Normally the que is crazy, and you still have to pay for it, and the librarians don't let you use the library computers because they want to play online games with them.

Haih.

So, till next time.

Ciao

-Pau-

Official Diplomat from the Hartamas/Segambut Embassy in Rempit Johor

I ALMOST FORGOT.What's a cambridge?

Yay they're praying now so I got to sneak into the computer room and guess what? Is free! Just that if ustaj catches me, I'm dead meat.
Yeah I almost forgot to add, that day when I was walking to the canteen with my friends, I actually talked about how hard the math was, and then this guy said that it doesn't matter cause math is not important. You don't need math to become a doctor, but then I quoted statistics from Cambridge saying that 100% of their medical students have an A for math. And then guess what the guy said?
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What on Earth is a Cambridge?

I almost wanted to vommit blood and dig my eyeballs out, I couldn't believe what I just heard. This guy has went through the same education system, and it's hard to believe that he even had an extra year compared to me. And this is what we have.
You know as a chef, you can only make the best food with the best ingredients.
Like champange must be from Champagne, France, truffles must be from France, oysters and lobsters must be from Alaska and etcetra.

So let me ask you again.

What is a Cambridge?

4th post i think

OK here goes another few ringit.

I have a precious 3 hour break now since my classmates are having agama classes, and it so Hapenned that I;m the only non Moslem in class so I dont have to go, and I have 2 hours lunch today, and I don't have to que up for the computer.

Wohoo.

Shit wei I haven't got a good sleep for almost a week, and I feel like one of those zombie housemen in the hospitals. Seriously. I used to be one of those guys who would always sleep damn freaking early or something, but these days the work really catches up to you and the earliest I slept for this week was at 11.59.

What's worse is that one of my roomies left, and now there's an empty bed right? But guess what my other roomate brought his friend from dunno where, who sisn't even bother to ask permission or even introduce himself for that matter, and now I have an illegal roomate, who comes into the room in the dead of the night, makes a hell not of noise and laughs like a setan, and then sneaks away first thing in the morning. I mean, fine if you really want to sleep in my room, but at least have the courtesy to let the other roomtates know, and please don't laugh and yell in the dead of the night.

Did you know that because of that fucker, I woke up at 1 am, walked to my table, took my earplugs, and I had to stuff the sides of my head with 4 cubic cm of synthetic foam. And on top of that I even had to cover my head with the blanket, and I could still hear them telling stupid jokes of how some guy shitted in the toilet.

And if that didn't scare you, there was this Cina guy who celebrated his birthday by getting waterballooned, and as usual, the screaming continued until midnight, where they started singing

"zhu ni shen ri kuai le....."

Balls to them lah! Think I no need to sleep is it?

If you know my parents they know that the thing I hate the most in this world is to be woken from my sleep when I don't want to be. And next time someone tell me where to get good earplugs.

And to Muhammad Aizat, the roomate who left for Maktab Perguruan, damn you for not breaking the bed in half before you left. Damn wei. Then at least that immigrant guy can sleep on the floor.

Ok enough of yesterday. Lets talk about what I did for the freaking rest of the one and a half weeks. Bloody hell the water supply got screwed since Saturday cause of a leak and that day, I remember I was all hot and sweaty from playing tennis, I walked straight to the shower, twisted the tap, and out came one miserable drop of H2O. What a shame.

No problem, I told myself. I've been through worse. So I went down to the 3rd floor. No water as well. In fact there wasn't a single drop available until the 1st floor. Ok fine.

But then, only 4 of the sinks were working, and all of them were on the balcony, in that place where you wash clothes. Ok fine.

Then I turned the tap and out came a few drops. Ok fine.

Then I scubbed myself with soap and shampoo. Ok fine.

Now I look like Santa Claus. Ok fine

After 5 minutes there were 4 Santas, all half naked unlike the usual red coat and thick jacket. No reindeer either. Ok fine.

I'm taking part in communal bathing. Ok fine.

Then I had to rinse myself with whatever water I had in my miserable cedok (scoop) And then I went back to my room, terribly unsatisfied with me sweaty self. Ok fine. At least the water was cold.

And on the way back up only I realised how lucky I was. I saw 3 guys sitting down near the garage for the colleg bus bathing with a freaking garden hose, hosing themsleves like cars.

And I even saw this guy bathing with the hose that you usually wash you butt with. You know, the one next to the toilet bowl?

Then on Monday morning, I woke up. But instead of the usual alarm clock that went beep beep, I got the yelling of some guy going something like "OI TAKDE AIR!!! MANDI KAT MASJID WEI !!!"

After that stupid immigrant sneaked out I grabbed my BIG pail this time, walked all the way down, and guess what?

Some of the Malays went to the masjid to shower. The more patient (and smarter) boys went to the other dorm. So now its left with the stupid people like me, who were too grogy sue to the lack of sleep to make a proper decision.

There were 2 water taps near the block. On one tap, my warden, Ayah_Aji, was using his huge basin to fill water for whatever reason. And on the other tap, I saw the Kelantan boys who I played volleyball with just 2 weeks ago. In fact half the volleyball team was there, taking their bath by the roadside. What a sight to behold.

That was the turning point of my decision. At first I thought, well, its not that bad to take a bath in the open air, since the water is fresher and all, but when I saw those guys enjoying themselves and laughing I thought, well...... maybe not.

So I filled my pail and carried it back up. To bathe in relative privacy of course.

Ugh... how disgusting. It seems to be OK now, but I'm not taking any chances.

And during my usual public speaking sessions, where, as you know, I've become the speech writer due to racial quotas, I got the shock of my life when the guy I was writing my speech for, said that his parents would arrange his marriage after his education.

I don't know how the hell our conversation topic lead there, but it just came out of his mouth that God will choose a good wife for you since he believes in Qadaq and Qadhar, if I even spelled it right.

OMG. And his dad has a phD in engineering and his mom is a medical doctor. What's wrong with these people?

And so I found my new speech topic.

It's called freedom to choose your future life partner.

And I Goddamn hope they won't put me in ISA for that.

Well now, any good news from Johor?

Not much actually.

Save the fact that I learnt that something's wrong with my ironing technique, that I know how to 'ba' (reserve) the laundry hanging place by hanging my underwear and socks neatly on the clothesline, occupying as much one dimensional space as possible, ad hanging your shirts in between your underwear so that no one can push your shirts together, causing them to dry unevenlly and smell like fish heads.

And I also improved my tennis to some extent. Yay. I'm sure Waikin can tell you a bit more since he was the first victim of my newly accuired skills. Haha.

Time for more news and news. Mid sem exams are coming in 2 weeks, Moral project due in 2 months, brain is overheating very very soon. Need to go home.

BTW I hope I can get back next week on the 13th cause I already have a ticket. Just hope the bus doesn't crash or something.

Haih..... still have 10 more minutes.

Now wait lemme think.

Ah yes I had very good durians from Sagil cause there was this teacher selling durians near the dorm by the roadside.

And I still hate those shits who smoke in the toilets. Bloody hell mother never teach. Go smoke in your own house or something. Its damn distracting when you're shitting and you look at the opposite cubicle and there's all this smoke forming beautiful clouds above the cubicle. Too bad it wasn't a freakin nuclear bomb mushroom cloud. Then at least the guy would die from gamma ray burns.

Oh god I'm getting more sadistic by the day. Haven't had my fair share of Hollywood and etertainment. Well at least I managed to sneak a radio into my room. Then at least I can tell the weather tommorrow.

Well I guess the best thing I learnt so far, apart from doing my laundry, is how to be gratefull for small things.

To be honest, I have never tasted better oranges and apples before, especially when you cut them yourself, even though I have to eat above a rubbish bin. (My cutting skills aren't that good, and there's no such thing as an orange without juice you know)

Ok Ok my time is about used up. Time to go for lunch, and hope the flies don't eat it before I do.

P.S Did you know that after Melaka, this place has the 2nd most flies in Malaysia?